Sound Off

I just have to vent a little here. I'm frustrated. I think I partly have myself to blame however. My frustrations began why back when Brady was really sick and I knew in my heart of hearts something was seriously wrong. I'd take him to the doctor however and he would say oh he's fine, just give it some time. Because he had the M.D. next to his name and I do not, I took his word for it instead of listening to the mommy instincts screaming inside of me that was saying no, he was not fine. It literally took multiple visits and me crying in the pediatricians office before he finally referred us to a specialist. Turned out he was aspirating, getting formula into his lungs. If we had waited any longer Brady would have ended up in the hospital with pneumonia. If I had either demanded something sooner from the pediatrician or gone around him myself and started taking Brady to different specialists, perhaps we would have had his issue diagnosed sooner. I should have learned my lesson then. Last month at Brady's 9 month check up I brought up the bump in his belly that the physician's assistant had thought was a hernia. He in turn dismissed that as a possibility but had no clue what it was. He was baffled and finally decided we should start with a dermatologist. I knew right at that moment in my heart of hearts that was the wrong way to go. The lump is not on his skin, it is inside his belly, protruding out. But once again, I thought he's the doctor, I guess we'll start where he recommends. So we made an appointment and had to wait an entire month to be seen. Today was our appointment. The doctor looked at the lump and said, "Oh, this isn't even on his skin, I don't know what this is." Um, yeah, another $30 copay down the drain. She thinks the lump feels benign and doesn't think it should be of concern, but she doesn't know. This lump clearly isn't normal and until someone can tell me they know its benign and they know I shouldn't worry, then I won't. The dermatologist then referred us to a pediatric surgeon. They will examine the lump and decide if they feel it needs some sort of imaging (sonogram or cat scan) or ultimately surgery. Thank God we only have to wait until the 31st for this appointment. I just want to put this lump business behind us.
To end on a sweeter note...today and tomorrow the boys' school is closed for teacher in service. Brad stayed home with the boys this morning and played so hard with the boys Brady just tuckered out on the couch in the middle of playing.